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Sure Dad Says

Take Me Out To The Ballgame 

I really enjoy baseball―it’s been “berry, berry good to me” (credit the infamous SNL’s Garrett Morris routine). Some non-followers (in my very own family, no less) compare viewing a game on TV to watching paint dry. Oh, how unobservant they are. Seeing the athleticism, strategy and excitement of a close game is lots of fun,… Continue Reading

STAMP OUT BREAST CANCER

Since 2000, Sure Dad has participated in major walking events to raise money for breast cancer. He has raised over $330,000 in total to combat this dreadful disease, and currently is sponsored for over $45,000 per event. His crazy and lovable cousin Hayda succumbed to breast cancer when she was in the prime of her… Continue Reading

Statistics 101

You can do anything with numbers. You can add, subtract, multiply, divide. But almost as importantly, you can use numerical information to justify virtually anything. Or you can use stupid (and mostly made-up) statistics to come to the most illogical and absurd conclusions. For instance, if 5 percent of U.S. car owners drive hybrid autos,… Continue Reading

New Year’s Resolutions Redux

OK, so raise your hand if you’ve, yet again, wasted your time embarking on that fruitless effort, making a list of ways to better yourself this year. Don’t you ever learn? Don’t you know that if you’re anything like me (God forbid), you will be lucky to last a week before breaking every one of… Continue Reading

Wascally Wabbit

Thankfully, I’m not a hunter. However, I understand there are those who really enjoy this activity. God knows why, so here’s my take on what they actually call a sport. First, a little step back into history. In the olden days, men were hunters and women were gatherers. This segregation of duties was instituted for… Continue Reading

Political Mascots

If you were in charge of picking the symbol for your political party, what would you choose? Would it be something dynamic, innovative and distinct? Or would it be something stupid, like the ones the Democrats and Republicans selected long ago? As we all know, the mascot of the Democratic Party is a donkey. I’m… Continue Reading

The Fruits of Our Labors

As I’ve mentioned before, the naming of the final holiday of summer really baffles me: Labor Day. Simply put, I have no idea why we pick that time of year to celebrate the birth process. Can’t we find something more appropriate to commemorate? Ask any mother, and I’m sure she doesn’t have fond memories of… Continue Reading

Crystal Ball

Do you believe in ESP? Color me “unsure,” as I wouldn’t be too dismissive about the possibility of some people having the ability to predict the future. Who knows?  I absolutely do believe in ESPN, though. There have been countless instances of very bizarre situations when those seeming to possess that special sense were not… Continue Reading

Private Parts

Who do you think came up with the names for our body parts? It’s a real mystery, as no one really knows. And why in the world would those references be so funny sounding? The mere mention of our privates causes many to giggle. Don’t we name most things as they relate to their function?… Continue Reading

I Believe

Yes, I’m a Jewish boy, raised in a Jewish household, and have lots of Jewish values instilled in me. Of course, Jewish guilt is a big one, but that’s a whole other story. Anyway, I’m very proud of my heritage, and for lots of reasons (not the least of which is because so many died… Continue Reading